You Say Bitch as if it is a Bad Thing

It is only to often in today’s society that negative terms describing women are thrown around casually. Many of these terms have histories directed at making a woman feel bad of self conscious about herself. These expressions were in fact created for the purpose of holding power against women. In today’s society the word bitch is used quite commonly. Although there are several definitions and different contexts in which the word can be used, the true and correct definition is suppressed by the chauvinistic society of today. One might first assume that the phrase bitch is a negative way to describe a woman when in reality the characteristics of a bitch mirror the qualities of a strong and proud woman. A Bitch is an outspoken woman who is never submissive; she has strong opinions and is not afraid to voice them and stand up for what she believes.

The word bitch started with a definition that only applied to female dogs because of their loud, aggressive temperament during heat and their violent reactions while protecting puppies. In later years, this term began being used to describe women in comparison with those negative attributes of the female dog. The definition fluctuated again in the Eighties and became used as a positive adjective. It was used as a slang term by teens and surfers of the time as a way to say good or cool. This change paralleled the third wave feminism when women were trying to reclaim the terms that once described women negatively. Although they were unsuccessful in removing the word from common vocabulary, the power that it had against woman was discontinued for a time. Then again in the Nineties as the third wave feminism came about, the word was claimed again by women. All of a sudden, “bitch” was used in books and songs by women as a descriptive word for themselves and other powerful woman like them. They embraced the word for what it meant instead of letting it suppress them and hold them back. By using this word to describe self-empowerment, the women of the Nineties spawned a new phenomenon of girl-power. In her song “Bitch,” Meredith Brooks sings,

“I'm a bitch, I'm a lover…

I'm a sinner, I'm a saint

I do not feel ashamed…

You know you wouldn't want it any other way

So take me as I am

This may mean you'll have to be a stronger man.” (AZLyrics.com)

She shows her empowerment in this song directed at a male in her life. A very important detail is that after referring to herself as a bitch, she writes that she is not ashamed of who she is. She goes on to compete with a man’s strength when she comments that the subject of the song may need to be stronger to handle her tough, free-spirited character. Unfortunately, after this movement in the Nineties, the hip-hop era during the turn of the millennium brought the negative connotations back using expressions such as bitch, slut, and whore in derogatory ways through song lyrics once again. This continued to the present day where feminism and bitch were joined together and used negatively.

Following the push from the third wave feminism to make bitch a positive expression, the term bitch received a few new definitions. It was soon connected with highly feminist women. As Michelle Humphrey puts it in her review of Bitch: The Noun, the Verb, the Magazine,

“These days the word “bitch” is as loaded as the term “feminist” –both are lobbed at uppity ladies who dare speak up and who don’t back down. This is not to say that Bitch is down with being gratuitously mean or catty; no, we just know that taking a stand is usually more important to being nice…” (Humphrey, p.1)

Both the word bitch and feminist have been given negative associations because they are seen as women who do not comply with the standards of society. Men especially use these terms in derogatory ways using these words to de-power and belittle women. It is almost close to a scare tactic method used to get women to comply with societal standards because they are afraid of being talked about negatively especially in such derogatory terms. Being called a feminist draws similar connotations to being a bitch. So why is it then that the phrase male-chauvinist is not so common and comparatively there in no male version of the word bitch to go along with it. It is because men are the driving factor behind these connotations it is their protection against the determined and tenacious women that threaten them. Breaking this barrier is just like breaking stereotypes, it might be hard and take time, but it is worth the effort for a new identity.

In the past the word bitch has always had such negative connotations, and it is time to show the true positive colors of the term. In reality the word bitch describes positive qualities, outspokenness, strong beliefs and not succumbing to societies stereotypes. However, this word has been used against women to keep them submissive. It was a word created to intimidate women into keeping quiet and just go with the flow even if she disagreed. The word carries such a negative and harsh meaning that most women comply with todays social standards to avoid ever hearing this expression. According to Urban Dictionary online, a Bitch is: “A woman that doesn't give a flying fuck anymore and that can and will be cruel to men,” or “a women with a bad attitude”. Both of these definitions can be interpreted very differently by anyone who might read them and therefore it would be easy for anyone, but especially men to use them against women. Because bitch can be construed in many different manners women have grown to be extra cautious, as it is so easy to trigger people. An excerpt from Elizabeth Wurtzel’s book: Bitch: in Praise of Difficult Women, comments on this fact,

“She may, in fact, be as nice as can be, but as soon as she says catch me if you can I’m so free this is my life and the rest can fuck off and die –as soon as she lays down the option of my way or the highway, it’s amazing how quickly everyone finds her difficult, crazy, a nightmare: a bitch.” (Wurtzel, p.30)

Wurtzel continues to explore the double standard between men being this bold and how women are shut down for the same thing. Society has grown a double standard that regulates how men should be powerful and strong and that women should be submissive and follow. With all the equal rights movements that have changed our culture over the past centuries, it is a pity to see that just one word can bring back the in-equalities that the women of the past tried so hard to break.

It has become easier in the last few years for women to take more control, and accordingly the time for a re-definition; a “Bitch” makeover is here. The Definition of bitch as described earlier as a strong woman, who is not afraid to express her opinions, is nothing to be ashamed of. The qualities of a bitch are good, honest, noble characteristics that any woman should be proud of. If anything, the term came about because men felt threatened by a strong, willed, and powerful woman. Now, women have nothing to hide from, it is a good thing to be a bitch! Growing up as a young girl, parents shower their daughters mind’s with praise and hope, and the encouragement to be strong. Phrases such as: “you can do anything you want if you set you mind to it”, and “dream big, reach for the stars” are phrases that seem like realities to a young girl. These sayings should truly be embraced and practiced as we grow the next generation of determined, strong, creative and intelligent women. No more suppression or conforming to society, express yourself and most of all show the inner bitch that makes you a force to be reckoned with!

Works Cited

Humphrey, Michelle. "Review: Bitch: The Noun, the Verb, the Magazine." Rev. of Bitch: The Noun, the Verb, the Magazine. The Women's Review of Books Mar.-Apr. 2007: 26-27. JSTOR. Web. 10 Oct. 2011.

"Meridith Brooks Lyrics - Bitch." A-Z Lyrics Universe. AZLyrics.com. Web. 11 Oct. 2011.

Stwertka, Eve, and Margo Viscusi. "Chapter 4." Twenty-four Ways of Looking at Mary McCarthy: the Writer and Her Work. Westport, CT: Greenwood, 1996. Print.

"Urban Dictionary: Bitch." Urban Dictionary, October 17: Sporking. Urban Dictionary, 12 June 2006. Web. 10 Oct. 2011.

Wurtzel, Elizabeth. Bitch: in Praise of Difficult Women. New York: Anchor /Doubleday, 1999. Print.

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